by Sonja J. Keith

A day doesn’t go by that Melanie Brindley doesn’t think of her husband, who died 16 years ago after heroically saving a young boy from drowning. She is honoring his memory and his Good Samaritan personality as a determined advocate for water safety.

“Drowning is a world health epidemic,” Melanie said. “It crosses all ages and it doesn’t discriminate at all – for economics, color or race. Anyone can drown, but we say there are layers of protection that can help prevent it.”

In 2003, the Brindley Family — Ken and Melanie and their two children, Madeline and Blake — was on vacation at Grayton Beach, Fla. A 12-year-old boy and his boogie board were taken seaward by rough water conditions in the Gulf of Mexico, and his father, 60, experienced difficulty during a rescue attempt. Ken, 36, an Acxiom account executive, and others swam out for the victims. The boy was saved and the rescuers attempted to remove the boy’s father, who had been overcome in the water, but conditions were too rough. Ken, too, was overcome. The father drowned, and Ken was taken to the hospital, where he died two days later, also of drowning.

The two men died on what became known as “Black Sunday” for the Emerald Coast. On that red flag day on the Florida panhandle, eight people drowned, and dozens of others nearly drowned and had to be rescued from powerful rip currents.

Ken was recognized with the Carnegie Medal for his heroism. The medal is given throughout the United States and Canada to those who risk their lives to an extraordinary degree while saving or attempting to save the lives of others. 

Melanie noted that drowning prevention is now getting more attention nationwide, unfortunately because of the deaths of children born to well-known individuals, like Bode Miller. She said the American Academy of Pediatrics recently released new guidelines on water safety. She said pediatric healthcare providers are to include drowning and water safety information in discussions with parents/guardians during well child visits. “That’s a big first step for our whole country,” said Melanie.

In 2017, nearly 1,000 children died from drowning, according to the AAP, and 8,700 visited a hospital emergency room because of a drowning event – with toddlers and teens at the highest risk.

Melanie is a member of the National Drowning Prevention Alliance (NDPA), which reports that drowning is the No. 1 cause of accidental death for children ages 1 to 4. It is No. 2 for children to age 14 and fifth overall.

NDPA is a group of individual families who have banded together “to put an end to the silent epidemic that is drowning.” Melanie joined in 2014 and recently attended the group’s conference in New Orleans. The organization reports “that drowning has become so commonplace that each incident is often treated with casual interest, reduced to ‘just another drowning’ on the local news. Meanwhile, the epidemic marches on, claiming the lives of thousands of Americans each year, leaving countless shattered hearts in its wake.

“The names are different, but collectively, our families face the same empty chair, every day…United we say, ‘Not one more drowning.’ Not one more empty chair.”

Through NDPA and Families United to Prevent Drowning (a pillar of NDPA), Melanie has heard the stories of other families forever changed due to drowning. She recalls stories of children ages 1 to 5 who were put down for a nap and were out of a parent’s sight for a minute, but they woke up, walked outside and drowned. “It’s very, very sad,” she said, adding that every family then learns that the drowning could have been prevented. 

Sometimes that is swim lessons, according to Melanie, or teaching an infant to flip on their back in water and float. Fencing, locks and alarms are also preventative measures as is wearing a life jacket when boating.

“We always stress water watchers,” she said, adding it is important, even if there is a lifeguard, to watch children in and around water. “I can’t tell you how many stories there are of children drowning in a pool filled with kids and two or three lifeguards,” said. “If you are a parent or family member or someone who took a child to a pool, your eyes need to be on that child at all times, or someone in your group needs to be the water watcher.”

Melanie has met other families in Arkansas that have been touched by drowning and there is an interest in working together to promote water safety with other organizations, like the Corps of Engineers and the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission. 

Melanie said one of the families lost a son who was a competitive swimmer and a lifeguard, and who drowned in a river accident. Another lost two young boys who drowned in an above ground pool. She said they have been brought together by tragedy and the desire to help others in the state to avoid loss. “We don’t want anyone else to live like that when we know it can be prevented.”

Melanie has created the Ken Brindley Memorial Foundation (wise water safe swimmer) to promote water safety while raising funds to implement prevention measures, including vouchers for free swimming lessons and life jacket sharing stations. The foundation has been incorporated and she is awaiting non-profit status from the IRS before accepting donations and conducting fundraisers.

Melanie has printed cards that have the Foundation logo on one side with #honorken and #notonemoredrowning. Helpful information and preventions measures are listed on the back. 

“Drowning is preventable,” Melanie said. “It shouldn’t happen if you have the layers of protection.”

The Foundation’s mission statement includes a clause that recognizes Ken’s desire to help others and states it “shall continue the legacy of Ken Brindley, which was always to be a Good Samaritan in helping those in need, and may extend its scope from water safety to being a resource to make a person’s life a little easier.”

“That’s something I would like to carry on in some small way.”

The loss of a loved one is “hard all the time,” Melanie said, but learning coping mechanisms helps, like being proactive and helping others. She said it is especially difficult during “big life events,” like her children’s graduations or her daughter’s wedding. “It makes my heart the saddest that I’m standing there alone without their dad beside me,” she said. “Between the three of us, we know he knows and he would be proud.”

For more information on the Foundation or local efforts to help prevent drowning, visit the Ken Brindley Memorial Foundation page on Facebook or email Melanie at [email protected]. A website is being created for the Foundation – swimsafety.org.

Looking back on that fateful day, Melanie said had she been down on the beach with Ken that day, she wouldn’t have been able to keep him from going in. But now, armed with the information she has learned, she would’ve sent something that floats – an empty ice chest or life jacket. “That’s why I’m here to tell people that.”