By Sonja J. Keith
Three little boys and their families – the Russells and O’Connors – share a special bond following a journey that began in Conway and took them halfway around the world.

Tricia and Rob O’Connor along with their 3-year-old son Ben traveled to Vietnam this summer with Drs. Brian and Shelley Russell, their 4 1/2-year-old daughter Zoe and Shelley’s parents to adopt children. They returned home June 28 with two additions to their travel party – Liam O’Connor and Sam Russell.
It was the second adoption from Vietnam for the O’Connors. They arrived home with Ben on Christmas Eve, 2006. It was the first adoption, and perhaps the only one, for the Russells.
It was through Dillon International, their adoption agency, that the couples met at a workshop. Shelley posted a question on the agency website, and Tricia responded. Later, when the O’Connors had dinner with the Russells, little did both families know that it would be the beginning of an incredible journey that they anticipate will last a lifetime.
The Russells
In February 2007, the Russells attended an informational meeting hosted by Dillon International to collect more information on adoption. “We pondered over it for quite a while before beginning the application process,” Shelley said.
While paperwork was time-consuming and tedious, one of the most difficult aspects of the process was the wait for travel clearance after all the documents had been filed. They “met” Sam via picture and some scant medical information in late September 2007. They would get reports on his health and updated pictures from other parents who traveled to the orphanage, but it was difficult to see their son growing older each month without them.
The Russells had expected to travel in early 2008 but the weeks of waiting turned into months, and still the clearance didn’t come.
“Big sister Zoe would pray every night to help bring Sam home,” Shelley said. “It’s funny now to see them fussing and fighting as brother and sister.”
Aside from the emotional struggle as parents, another challenge the Russells faced was related to their professional obligations with their dermatology clinic.
“After the third month of shuffling our clinic schedules, and then not receiving our expected travel approval, we just gave up and waited until our approval arrived, which only gave us a short time to adjust our schedules,” Shelley said. “Our girls at the clinic were such troopers calling so many patients and trying to facilitate them as best they could when they were rescheduling. It was a tough job, and they worked so hard to help us.”
Shelley and Tricia found support and encouragement from others who had adopted or were adopting from the same country – a group of 12 women who call themselves “Vietmoms.” The group, which includes five Conway families, meets monthly in Maumelle.
Each month, the group felt certain that the Russells would be traveling soon and Shelley would be absent the next time the group got together, but when the next meeting rolled around there was still no date.
Shelley describes the wait as “prolonged labor,” but is thankful now that it worked out that the two families would travel together. “I so totally see a reason for that to happen – for our travel group to go together….From an emotional standpoint, as Ben, Sam and Liam grow up together, I think that common, shared history will be so beneficial.”
Interestingly, the O’Connors received their travel date first, on a Friday, with the Russells getting theirs the next Monday.
Looking back on the experience, the Russells have been touched, not only by the efforts of their staff, but also by the reaction of their patients. “It was so heartening to see how understanding and supportive our patients were in the whole ‘shuffling about’ of their schedules. Not only were they understanding, many of them brought him ‘welcome home’ cards and gifts, and they rejoiced with us that he finally made it here!
“Brian and I said many times, ‘It takes a village!’ Sam had no idea how many people flexed their schedules, prayed for him, and helped in so many ways to get him home. His ‘village’ in Conway was helping him before they had even met. He has come home to a wonderful community. We are so very, very blessed.”
The O’Connors
For the O’Connors, there was no question about the country they would select for their second adoption. But little did they know that when they started the paperwork in June 2007, that the clock was ticking on the adoption agreement between Vietnam and the United States.
“When we started Liam’s adoption, we didn’t know the three-year agreement would expire,” Tricia said. “We were done with the paperwork and on the waiting list, but we knew the program could shut down before our referral.”
Although already familiar with the process and the time involved, the waiting for Liam was still hard for the O’Connors. “Waiting for your child is difficult,” said Rob. “As husbands and fathers, Brian and I shared the experience of trying to comfort our wives while we all waited to travel to Vietnam.”
Fortunately, the two Conway families found support in each other. “Becoming friends with people like Brian and Shelley and others who share the experience of international adoption is one of the unexpected joys of the whole process.”
Tricia agrees. “Our families have become really close, which is a tremendous blessing.”
When travel clearance was finally received, a lot of arrangements had to be made in a short time. The trip involved nine flights and travel accommodations for the group of 10. “There were no delays on any flight we were on,” Tricia said. “The trip in-country went as planned.”
Shelley noted how beneficial it was to travel with the O’Connors in light of their previous adoption from Vietnam. “Tricia is a natural-born organizer. She knew where to go and what to do.”
Both women describe Shelley’s parents accompanying them as “the saving grace” during the two-week trip. They provided tremendous emotional support but also practical assistance with babysitting and luggage transport, which could be tricky with four young children in tow.
“I’m so glad they were there,” Tricia said, adding they are also grateful to take Ben with them to meet his brother for the first time. “He was an excellent traveler and we can’t imagine having gone back to Vietnam without him.”
Likewise, Brian and Shelley felt that making the journey with Zoe was the right decision. “She was able to be a part of the process, to see where her brother spent the first two years of his life. She was quite a trooper, and she enjoyed being the big sister to all three boys,” Shelley said.
Though Tricia knew what to expect on the trip, she still found it “hard” at times. “It is definitely the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  It’s great but there’s nothing like it.”
While in Vietnam, the O’Connors were able to visit Ben’s orphanage, giving his caregivers an opportunity to see how well he is doing. “We feel fortunate that we were able to have that experience,” Tricia said. “It will help us help him later as he has questions about the earlier time in his life…..They were so happy to see him. They were thrilled.” Since returning home, both families have had to transition from caring for one child to two. “We’ve had to learn how to parent two children at one time,” Tricia said. “Sleep deprivation has been the hardest. But overall, our boys are a true joy. We are living our dream.”
As they look forward, both families hope to remain close and share special occasions together. “Even though we started our adoptions at different times, it was great to ultimately travel to Vietnam together and to meet our new children together,” Rob said. “International adoption is such a personal experience. To be close to people who understand what that is like is a great feeling.
“And as wonderful as it is for the parents to share this experience, it will be even more meaningful for our children, as they grow up, to have friends whose family story is like their own.”
Shelley is also hopeful that others will consider adoption. “I hope our story would be of some inspiration for a family to consider growing their family through adoption,” she said. “There are terrific kids out there that really need a family. And ultimately, we the parents are the lucky ones. We now have this amazing, joyous little boy as a member of our family. How great is that?”