By Sonja J. Keith
For many parents, the end of August usually means back to school with new school clothes, school supplies and school schedules. For Monte and Jami Smith of Conway, back to school means all of that – multiplied by five. The Smiths have five children – ages 10 to 18 – who headed back to school last year to five different schools. This year, only four.
A graduate of Baylor University, Jami was working for a banking firm in Dallas when the couple met. Monte – employed by JC Penney and living in Little Rock – happened to be in Texas one weekend in June 1985, visiting a brother when he and Jami met at the Greenville Avenue Country Club.
“It was love at first sight – literally,” Jami said. “We dated long distance over the summer, got engaged that Thanksgiving and were married in June of ’86.  We have been married 22 years.”
In August 1999, the Smiths and their children moved to Conway. “We absolutely love it.” Monte and his brothers now have a company that manufactures, markets and distributes aircraft anti-corrosion products. Jami, who has an accounting degree and a CPA license, also went back to school to get a degree in nursing from the University of Arkansas at Little Rock. She has an RN license.
But caring for her family – which includes daughters Sadie and Addie and sons Tanner, Slater and Jackson – leaves little time to work.
“I’m not using any of these degrees right now,” she said. “I thought when Addie started kindergarten that I wanted to ‘do something’ and I quickly discovered by going to nursing school full time with five kids that I really already have a full-time job and that for now this is what I want to be doing.”
So, what’s it like having five children?
“It’s a wild ride and I wouldn’t change it for the world. It’s fun and frantic, and there’s never a dull moment. We absolutely love it.”
“We both always wanted a big family,” added Monte. “The biggest challenge is just finding time for everyone to be together.”
“I love it when we are all together for dinner and it just doesn’t happen often enough during the school year with everyone’s crazy schedules,” said Jami.
The Smith kids are involved in a variety of activities at school and off campus. There are some common interests – all five play soccer and are involved in K-Life. Other activities they might share with a sibling or not. For example, both Slater and Jackson will play football at Carl Stuart Middle School this fall, and both play in the school band. Tanner, on the other hand, is the only cross country runner among the group.
To keep up with all the various activities, the Smiths utilize a color-coded master calendar.
“I have to admit that by now I am really pretty good at this coordination thing. If George W. needed me to, I could step in and run the country for a couple of days,” Jami jokes. “I have a dry-erase board calendar on my refrigerator that is color-coded for every child. I can get up each day and look at the calendar and my brain can just churn out the logistics for any one particular day. I do the calendar for one-month time frames and then I have a desk calendar for future dates."
The calendar is important not only to get their children to their designated places on time but mom and dad as well. For example, with all five kids active in K-LIFE, it was only natural that both Jami and Monte would serve on the organization’s board. “Monte and I are a really good team. Our strengths and weaknesses as parents complement each other. From the moment our first was born, it was just a natural for both of us to be very hands-on parents.
“We’re also very fortunate in that Monte’s work schedule allows him to be very hands-on. He travels for his job, but when he’s not traveling he works out of the house.”
Jami has always been involved with her kids’ activities – from volunteering as room mom to serving as a PTO officer. “That’s just something I have always enjoyed doing,” she said.
“We also go to lots and lots of sporting events. It’s rare for both of us to ever see a game or event at the same time and sometimes it’s a shuffle for even one of us to be somewhere when everyone has an activity going on, but we do our very best to make it to everything.”
Monte and Jami also stay connected with their kids by encouraging them to have friends over. “Even though we may not be ‘hanging out’ directly with just our children, it’s just one more way to stay in touch with their lives,” he said. “I guess basically we try to be a constant and consistent supporting presence in everything they do.”
“With my first child and even second I felt like I needed to chair everything. I had to do it all,” Jami said. “But then you realize it can be as simple as showing up to take pictures when your child goes on a mission trip or sending snacks or a dessert for a teacher appreciation event or just showing up for meet-the-teacher nights. Every little thing you do as a parent adds up to lots of involvement and support.”
While the kids are active throughout the year, the Smiths enjoy the “long, lazy days” of summer. “We will be ‘physically’ ready to go back to school because that’s just what has to be done but we love summer at our house,” Jami said. “We love the lack of structure and schedules – just good old summer fun. Plus it’s a time when we’re all together more.”
As the summer draws to a close at the Smith house, there will be an element of excitement and anticipation for the new school year. “This year will seem calm compared to last year,” Jami said. “They were all five in five different schools and that was a whirlwind. Once school got going and everyone and thing was in its place, it was fine…but whew. Those first few weeks were crazy.”
The annual shopping trip to buy school supplies will help the family make the transition. While it can be an arduous task, the Smiths make a fun day of it. “We love school supply shopping,” Jami said. “We do a big Excel spreadsheet and basically consolidate everyone’s school list, by child, and then hit the town. We make a day of it – shop, go to lunch. It’s fun. It’s gotten easier as the kids have gotten older because once they hit high school the lists are much smaller and much more individualized to their classes.”
While the Smiths have back to school and school supplies down to a routine, things will be a little different come this August. The Smith’s youngest child, Addie, will attend Ruth Doyle Intermediate this fall – elementary school years are behind them. Slater and Jackson will be at Carl Stuart Middle School and Tanner at Conway High-East.
Also, the Smiths’ oldest, Sadie, will be a high school senior, which promises an exciting and emotional year for her parents.
“As parents, Monte and I are so proud of who Sadie has become and it’s exciting for us to anticipate and see everything her future has to offer. Visiting colleges and making plans, it is all very exciting. But I will admit, I am already so emotional. The least little thing can set me off. I had to take the song ‘Butterfly Kisses’ off of my iPod.”
Even shopping for a birthday card for her daughter recently proved an emotional experience. “It was as if Hallmark was out to get me that day. Every card I looked at was something along the lines of ‘it was just yesterday you were our little girl and now…’  There I was, in the Hallmark store, wiping away tears over greeting cards!
“My boys love to tease me about Sadie leaving. They are relentless and then they’ll go on to let me know that they too will be departing not too long after that. I’ve had so many friends tell me that it is such a whirlwind year and it will go by so fast so we’re trying to be prepared but I’m afraid it’s probably going to be like so many life experiences are. You have to experience them to really know.”
The Smiths have some simple advice for other parents that is valuable as school gets started as well as throughout the year. “Cherish every second of every moment. As cliché as it sounds, it really does seem like yesterday that my five were all babies and now I have three teenagers, a senior in high school, no more kids in elementary school. It really does go by so fast.
“And it’s all good. They’re all growing up and doing all the things that as parents we want them to do. I know the next stages in life will be just as wonderful, but oh my goodness time flies! Especially as we approach ‘back to school’ and it’s so easy to get caught up in our ‘to do’ lists and the daily craziness of schedules.
“But when you’re flying out the door to drive your kids to school on time or pick them up on time to make sure you get them to soccer or dance or whatever, take a deep breath and stop to drink it in when you can because it won’t be long before they’ll be driving themselves or even driving away.”